Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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