he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
