This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
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