I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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