I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
