Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize