if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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