There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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