I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Randomize
