Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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