i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
