haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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