just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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