East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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