i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
The struggles of a small town man whore
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
