I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
