Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize