Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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