So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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