I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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