I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize