I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
