I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
