No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
it's great music for shaving your balls
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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