I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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