Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Randomize
