Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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