so that wasnt chicken after all
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
