: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
