I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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