Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
