You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
