ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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