Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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