My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
