i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
