Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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