If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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