Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
