i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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