Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I party with great urgency now.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize