We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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