your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
