For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
