hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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