nutella sex= disaster
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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