I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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