I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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