I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
