I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
