white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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